She doesn't like the way they look

Hearing Aids
#1

My wife just came back from the audiologist and she was offered some hearing aids that were about £1k. This is in our budget but she told me that she didn’t want to wear them because she didn’t like how they looked :frowning: I saw a picture of them and they basically would look invisible on her!

I don’t understand why she said this. She doesn’t know why she feels like this either. Has anyone else felt similar? Why is she saying this? They could really help her. Do you know if there is any alternative instead of hearing aids?

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#2

Yeah @user746… Vanity is difficult for some folks to overcome, the stigma attached to hearing aids is gradually being eroded by the younger generations, and in comparison to certain ear buds, hearing aids are nearly invisible… It is well documented in research on hearing loss, if one goes unaided, and you run the higher risk of dementia, perhaps due to lack of brain stimulation? Isolation is a major factor! Plus the fact, it is clearly apparent to friends, and family that you have a hearing loss, especially when you don’t wear your aids! Costco here in the UK, do top line aids on a budget, you pay upfront, but you have I believe 3 months to return them for a full refund, these aids are rebranded from the major manufacturers, around £1400 per pair, fully fitted and they use best practices like REM… also Boots Hearing Care will let you buy their top line aids, on credit,11% interest payable over 2 years… So there are options out there… Good luck, cheers Kev :wink:

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#3

Different styles of hearing aids are available. Their suitability is dependent on type and severity of hearing loss. Why is she saying this? It may be vanity. It may be that she doesn’t think she has a problem. It may be because she doesn’t think they’re worth the money. Doesn’t ultimately matter. Don’t push. The natural reaction to being pressured to do something is to come up with more reasons not to. Do let her know how it makes you feel that you have difficulty understanding her. Good luck.

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#4

Can you get a hearing aid trial in England? If so, suggest she tries the hearing aids. Once she “hears” the difference and how it helps her, she might decide to keep them.

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#5

Knowing that a good portion of the aids that are purchased just sit un-used in a drawer, if she is not willing to trade the (slight) look while wearing them for better hearing, then maybe dont shell out the money unless/until she is all in. I know a few couples that have unused aids sitting around and it can possibly breed some resentments.
I assumed everyone noticed mine yet some people i have worked with for years are still surprised to know i have been wearing them for a decade when they finally do notice.

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#6

Depends on the circumstance of course but I can understand the vanity. I was in my 40s when first fitted & was pretty happy as the first pair were … pretty much invisible. Grey hair very small grey aids - as long as my cut wasn’t military, you really couldn’t see them unless standing right beside me & even then likely only if I told you I was wearing them.

Well my 2nd pair after 8yrs - considerably bigger - still small vs many but yeh …more noticeable - & well the crop is a bit sparse these days so hair now is basically buzz cut mostly, so there was that too. BUT I tried them & the TECH & the extras overrode any qualms at all that I had. The advances in tech over 8 yrs was astounding to me - clear rich music again & bluetooth ON the aids - direct streaming etc etc …

1 or 2 days had me sold & LOL the only vanity I have now is the BT device name - had the audi change it to something a little obscure rather than declaring “Rays right hearing aid” to the network world LOL. I don’t really care if people see them - I tell people I have them & what they can do. When they come to talk & I put a finger up to say hang on - stop the streaming - ok speak LOL & they ask what was that about?

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#7

user746, without meaning to pry … how old is your wife? What kind of hair style does she have? I ask cuz I was fit wth my first pair of Starkey aids WAY back in the day at the age of 35. I lived in a really windy area, and even tho I had long hair, the wind would constantly blow it STRAIGHT UP like to crow over the P.A. system: “RED ALERT!!! Young, reasonably attractive gal is wearing AIDS!”

At that time, I had to wear the ugly, flesh-colored plastic molded ITE aids. I thought they were hideous. But OH BOY did I need them, so vanity had to take a hike.

Depending on your wife’s hearing loss, age, hair style and comfort level, well I’d go ZANY AND COLORFUL! If she needs the aids, folks around her will be impressed with how much better she’s hearing. Widex aids are like a designer statement, and I’d get one in RED if they sounded as good as Phonaks.

Take your time - up to a point. But if quality of life, treatment at work/school or even among friends & family is diminishing, then it’s time for her to face the music. There are far FAR worse health conditions than having a hearing difficulty. If that is all she has to contend with, she’s LUCKY.

And let’s face it, folks are walking all over now with the Apple dingle-dong dangling outta their ears, eh? So what’s the big deal?

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#8

I have been wearing RIC hearing aids for about 15 years. For about 5 or 6 years I had a pair that were BRIGHT RED. And I am still displeased that manufacturers have stopped making the bright colors. I have always worn my hair (dark brown) very short and am always amaze at people who have known me for quite some time but have no clue that I wear aids!!! So, it really is not about how they “look.”
I am constantly amazed by the people who are desperately afraid of wearing hearing aids because that will make them look “old.” And nothing you say will change that.
I agree with MDB and db-4art. If you can get aids for a trial period and ask her to wear them JUST for the trial period - - that MIGHT make a difference.
But the more you push the more she will back away!

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#9

I agree with what some of the others have said. I was in my early 40s when I first got hearing aids, and was adamant that I was getting in the canal ones because I did not want them to be noticeable. I was fine with people knowing that I was wearing them, but didn’t want it to be the first thing that people noticed when they saw me. However for my second set I was convinced to try RIC ones (where the biggest part of the aid is behind the ear). I really thought they were going to be noticeable, so decided to do the trial and see if anyone noticed. No one did! However, without the trial I probably never would have purchased them. Is it possible for her to do a trial before purchasing them?

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#10

There are many different types of hearing aids. Some RICs can be practically invisible. She’s got 2 choices wear hearing aids for better hearing or don’t? I’m 18 with on the larger side BTEs, thick tubing and full shell ear moulds, hearing aids aren’t associated with the elderly anymore. I’ve never had any negative comments from any of my pears.

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#11

Worth a read of a semi defunct blog called the Cookie Bite Chronicles- the writer is a lecturer at an art school and she decided to customise her HAs in creative ways.

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#12

Some have mentioned vanity but from your wording I don’t think that’s it because she isn’t concerned about how others see her but rather how she sees herself. Maybe it’s more about her own internal thoughts of what it means to wear them, like having to accept a disability. Maybe she’s fine with not hearing well. If her hearing loss is from advancing age, many people have trouble accepting that, but it will get worse and she will have missed out enjoying her relative youth now. If it’s from exposure to loud sounds like military explosives or rock concert amps, she might not like the memories or even feel guilty she didn’t take better care to protect her ears.

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#13

AMEN TO THAT! Maybe add an 11th Commandment to those listed in the other thread:
Thou shalt NOT deny your disability!
Seriously.

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