Welcome to the forum.
You sound frustrated but are actually doing very good. All your points are on line for a first time hearing aid user plus you have a reverse slope hearing loss. Your ears having different degrees of hearing loss also create more of a challenge to be fit properly and for you to adjust to.
All these things make it very difficult for you to acclimate to hearing aids. Even with the best fitter you need time to adjust. Your brain is hearing all these new things. It takes time.
I believe you have great aids now. As you read more here on the forum about hearing aids and your hearing loss, you will get educated. This will help you ask good questions and help your fitter help you.
Hang in there and good luck.